How to save a life
by Tellhound
Summary: About 2 months after John dies Sam and Dean is in another car accident and one of them die. Will the other make a deal to get him back? Takes place during S2. Rated T for blood and bad language. One-shot.


Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or the characters.

**A/N: **Sorry for not updating _Nightmares _and _Stranger I Know_ but I just don't know how to continue them. So for the past month I've been working on this one-shot instead. I'm not sure yet if I like the way I've written it since it's so different than how I usually write. So I would appreciate if you leave a review. Even if you're not logged in when you do. It would mean so much to me and it only takes a few seconds.

**Warning: **Blood and some bad language.

**How to save a life**

It was a dark and cold night in the middle of the summer. But Somewhere in the middle of a crossroad you could see a young man standing in only boots, jeans and a t-shirt. But he couldn't feel the cold. Right now he could only feel one thing. Pain. Not the kind of pain you feel when someone hit you or kick you. And not the kind of pain that's caused by words. No. This man was feeling the kind of pain you felt when you loose someone you'd do everything for. Someone you love. This man had just lost the only person he had left. This man had just lost his brother. So what exactly was this man doing there in the middle of the crossroad in the middle of the night? "Hello!" the blondish man yelled to no one. "Anyone there! Anyone that wanna make a deal!" It was pretty obvious that this guy was drunk. Drunk or insane. Maybe both. Who knew? When he didn't get any answer he looked down on the ground with unshed tears in his eyes. "Please, someone?" he whispered so low it was almost impossible to hear. Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder which made him jump a little. "Aw. Did I scare the big tough hunter?" The person said mockingly and let go of the man. He turned around and saw a black-haired girl wearing nothing but a black nightgown. Then the man made the horrible mistake and looked the girl in her brown eyes which caused painful memories to run through the man's head.

I look at my brother and feel like yelling at him. Don't get me wrong. I love Sam and I'd die for him but when he scratches my car it's just… How could he do that? Sam knows what that car means to me. "What the hell where you thinking, Sam!" I can see that he open his mouth to say something but I put up a hand in the air too stop him, to yell more at him. "Don't you give a fuck about her! Don't you know what this car means to me!" I know that it's wrong to be mad at him and yell at him. I know it's wrong to take out my anger on him, but… ever since dad died I have problems. Everyone tells me to let out my feelings and talk about it. But I'm afraid to do that. People expect me to cry and say how much I miss him. But I just can't do that. Don't get me wrong here. I miss the old man I do, but he was an asshole. The things he told me right before he died. The things he did when me and Sam where just kids. I wouldn't be able to just cry and talk because… for every single word that I would say I would just get angrier and angrier and… I honestly don't know what'll happen when I reach the top. I would probably hit or kick the nearest thing or person… and I just can't risk that. So what do I do? I take it out a little at the time on the people I love. On the few persons I have left. Bobby, Jo, Ellen… Sam. They are all paying for it when it clearly is my father I'm mad at. With a sigh I let my hand fall to my side and say: "Just make sure nothing like that never happens again, okay?" Sam just nods with a small smile but in his big brown eyes I can see everything. He's mad too. He just doesn't take it out on other people. No he takes it all out on the monsters we hunt. Don't think I don't take anything out on the monsters cause I do… it's just not enough. Nothing can ever be enough. I fake a smile that I know he can see through and just say: "Let's get inside." Before he answers I'm already inside the motel lying on my bed.

"What's the matter, Dean? Is the loss to much to handle?" The woman said mockingly again. Dean wanted to hit her right there and right then but knew that it wouldn't make things better, so he just made his hands into fists and said: "Can you do it or not?" He tried his hardest not to scream. "Oh, I can do it. The question here is; how many years are you ready to offer." the woman said. Dean didn't even hesitate when he answered: "As many as at it takes." The woman thought for a few seconds before saying: "I will give you… one year to live. One year and then I will send my dogs on you. That's more than your father ever got. Think of it"

"Think of it" My brother says while looking at me with those brown eyes of his. In moments like this I'm happy he doesn't make the puppy eye thing. It's hard enough to resist those nice eyes anyway. As usual I try my hardest to sound like I care more than anything about my car. I try to sound mad. And it comes surprisingly easy. "No, Sam. I'm not letting you drive my baby." The puppy eyes. Oh my God, he's gonna do the puppy eyes. Just in that moment he turns around and walks to the other side of the car and get in on the passenger side. Slowly I get in the car, my head full of thoughts about nothing and everything. And I don't know how or when but suddenly I'm driving on the road with Sam asleep in the passenger seat.

"I'll take that as a no." The woman turned around and began to walk away but stopped when Dean took a grip on her wrist. "No. Wait." He sounded desperate but tried not to. Please… I need… I need him." With tears almost running down his cheeks he let go of her and said: "Please…" The woman turned around towards Dean and revealed that her eyes where now red. She had this evil grin and said: "Do it, Dean. Do it."

"Do it, Dean. Stop the car." I can hear Sammy say from beside me. But I act like I can't hear him and just continue driving in the rain. "At least slow down the car." he tries with instead. I still act like I can't hear him and now I'm driving faster. From the corner of my eye I can see that he's getting slightly freaked. Whether it's because of how I'm acting or if it's cause the risk of getting in to a car accident is getting higher for every second, I don't know. I don't really care for the moment. I turn on the radio, happy to hear that it's Ramble On by Led Zeppelin that starts to blast through the speakers of my baby. But I can still hear my brother telling me to stop or at least slow down. I turn up the volume and get drawn in to the music and for just a couple of seconds I'm doing the biggest mistake I could ever do. I take a deep breath and close my eyes.

Dean swallowed and took a step towards the creepy woman. "One year and not a day earlier." Dean said, his voice cracking a little. "And you don't tell him. No one of your little demon friends tell him. Or I won't do this." The woman laughed and said: "Oh, you will do it. Because we both know that you can't live without him. And we both know he's dead because of you."

I wake up but don't want to open my eyes. I just want to go back to unconsciousness. My whole body is aching and… is that blood coming from my head? Afraid to open my eyes I just feel with my hand on my forehead and feel something wet and sticky. I take away my hand and slowly open my eyes and look at my blood covered hand. I know I have to lower my hand at some point but I'm afraid of what I might see if I do. So I continue to stare at it until I hear a voice from my left side saying: "I just called after an ambulance. Are you okay sir?" I let my hand fall down on my lap as I look at whoever it was that called me sir. The small round face with blue eyes and brown hair looked familiar somehow. "Dean?" He asks me surprised. "Do… Do I know you?" He ignores my question and say: "An ambulance is on its way and please don't look at or touch Sam." In just that moment I look at Sam and… I instantly have to look away not to throw up. "Oh my God! Is he… is he dead?" I ask with tears in my eyes. The man shakes his head and say: "No, but he will die if he doesn't get to the hospital soon. But I still want to know if you are okay, Dean." I take a deep breath and say: "I'm… I'm okay. But how… how do you know who I am?" I have to know. Also I have to take my mind off of Sam. Because I just can't… I can't take it. "Um… Six years ago in Texas. A poltergeist in my family's restaurant." "Andrew. You're Andrew." I say remembering him now.

"We both know you should be the one to be dead. You should have been dead two months ago if your dad hadn't decided to sell his soul for you. God, I wish I could have been the one to make that deal with him. But now I get to kiss you instead. I've always wanted to kiss a Winchester. Guess you'll have to do." The demon said, knowing it would affect Dean. "Shut up you bitch!" He hit her with his fist. She spit some blood and laughed. "Kiss me now or he's never coming back to life." She said with a smile.

I'm sitting on a hard plastic chair in a waiting room in some hospital. Andrew is still with me. He says he's not gonna leave me. At least not until I get to know anything about Sam. They have too come soon and tell me he is okay. That way I might feel less guilty for what happened.

Dean leaned in and was jut going to kiss her when she suddenly slapped him in the face and said: "Just kidding. I want to wait a few more minutes before making the deal. Look at you. All sad and vulnerable. I like you better this way." She lifted her hand too touch Dean's face but he backed away from her and said: "Don't touch me you bitch!" She let her hand fall down to her side and said teasingly: "Is the little whiny hunter scared of the girl?" She laughed. Usually Dean would say something back or hit her, but not this time. He just looked down on the ground.

"No. No. No. It's not true. It's not true. He can't… He can't be dead. Please, tell me it's a joke." Sam's doctor has just told me that Sam didn't make it through. That he's dead. But Sam can't be dead he just can't. "Mr Winchester, I know it's hard to hear but you have to accept the truth." The doctor says to me. I know he's right but I can't accept it. I don't want to accept it. I can feel a hand on my shoulder and Andrew saying: "I'm sorry Dean, but you won't get your brother back by standing here and denying it. Let go of the doctor and I will take you someplace where you can stay the night and let it all sink in." I realize I'm holding the doctor by his collar ready to hit him in the face. I let go of him and quickly begin to walk towards the exit. I don't want anyone to see the tears that are now streaming down my face.

Dean just wanted his brother back but he knew this demon wouldn't make the deal anytime soon. So he walked up to her and put his hand behind her head and then presses his lips against hers, holding her head so she couldn't pull away. He waned to be sure that Sam really got back to life. He wanted to be sure that he hadn't just thrown away the past 5-10 minutes just talking to a fucking demon. When he finally pulled away the demon smiled and said: "Who'd have known you wanted to kiss me that badly?" She laughed a little before saying: "You're brother is alive. Be happy while it lasts Dean, cause in 365 days I will come and get you." Then she disappeared right in front of his eyes.

A couple of days after Sam died I stole his body from the morgue and took it to a cabin a couple hundred miles away. That was last night. Tonight I made a deal with a demon. In just a few seconds I will get to know if he's back to life. I'm right outside the cabin, but I'm afraid to get in. I'm afraid that the bitch lied and that he's still dead. I take a deep breath and lay my hand on the door knob. I blow out the air in my lungs and then open the door. First I can't see anything cause it's too dark. I close the door and lights a candle. Now I can see Sam sitting on the bed I left him in. He just sits there on the edge and looks down on the floor. I can hardly believe that he's actually sitting there. He looks up at me and I can see the confusion in his eyes. I go up to him and hug him. I expect to feel the cold from his naked torso, but his skin is warm. It feels grate. I hated it when his skin was so cold so… I stop the thoughts so I won't begin to cry. He's warm but I can't help not to worry because he doesn't return the hug. I let go of him and try to look him in his eyes but his eyes are looking around in the room. Does he even know I'm here? "Sam?" I say and finally he rests his gaze on me. "Did… did… did…" he stop but I know what he want to ask. "Did I really die in that accident?" he finally asks. I smile and say: "What accident?" He looks down on the floor again and say: "The… the… The car accident." I don't want to lie to him about it but I feel like I have to so I say: "What? The accident two months ago? I was the one who nearly died then. You must have had a dream, Sam." Sam licks his lips and says: "A dream. Yes. That must be it." I walk over to Sam's duffel bag and throw it to him. "Hey. Put on a shirt and we'll leave." I look at him as he takes out his grey t-shirt and stands up to put it on. When I look at his bare chest all I can see is it full with bruises and blood. Just like it was when I left him. But it's not. Not really. Now that's just pictures in my head. Memories that will never go away. Sam died because of me and he's back thanks to me. I will never let him know what happened or what I did. But what will happen when I die?

**A/N: **Thanks for reading and don't forget to leave a review.


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